SIX!!!!!!

Wow…it’s so crazy to think we have a six year old. I look at Gabby today and I can still visualize exactly what she looked like the day she was born.

She is such a sweet, sweet girl and we love her so much! She is truly so happy. So confident. She is always so proud of herself with each new accomplishment. She is incredibly loving and motherly to her siblings… and even to friends (even noted by her teacher at our parent/teacher conferences!). She is also so very smart and eager to learn! Everything Gabby does involves a bit of drama…and you will always know when she is excited about something because she’ll talk VERY loud.

Since starting all-day kindergarten, and having gymnastics two nights a week on school nights (each class lasting 2 hours), we see so much less of Gabby. But, I guess that is life. As long as she is happy and thriving, we are happy for her! She LOVES school SO much… all-day kindergarten was definitely the perfect fit for her. On the weekends, she often tells us she wishes it was a school day because she loves school so much. And, on Monday morning, she is reminding us how much she loves school and how excited she is to go to school again.

Gabby also really loves gymnastics. She has received the “hardest worker” award 3 times now, and has also been recognized as “gymnast of the week”. She can do splits two ways, backbends and just recently she learned to do a back kickover from the backbend position. I see back walkovers happening in our near future.

When Gabby isn’t at school or gymnastics, she seems to be doing school related activities… like making books, writing letters to people, asking how to spell things or practicing her reading. OR, she’s doing various tumbling moves or trying to play “coach” to Rocco and Giuliana. Last weekend, she used two beginning to read books she received from her friend Leah for her birthday as her “coaching manuals” and led Rocco and Giuliana through at least an hour of “play gymnastics” It was really cute and the little kids loved all the attention.

Gabby is also in swimming class once a week and was just moved up to the Intermediate class. And, at the end of October, she decided to quit her dance class. I think she just got bored with it. She really loved being the show last year… you know, the costumes, the makeup, being on stage and in the spotlight… but when it came down to the weekly class, she just no longer had interest for it. Selfish me is somewhat happy about her decision to quit dance – now WE get to spend time with her on Monday after school! Yay!

Gabby has made a number of new/good friends since we moved here. There are five kids in the neighborhood that she really enjoys playing with. She made 3 great friends through her gymnastics class, and there are also several new good girlfriends at school. It’s good to know she is not afraid to make new friends. And, it will be fun to see what friendships continue to develop and which fade due to interests, time, and other commitments.

We recently had our parent teacher conferences with Gabby’s teacher, Ms. T. We really enjoyed hearing the teacher’s perspective on our child and some of the kindergarten stories and things that happen in the classroom. Ms. T told us that Gabby is one of the top readers in her class and is well above average for reading skills and letter sounds/recognition. She said Gabby is a delight in the classroom and that everything she does comes with a bit of drama… whether it’s tying her shoes, asking to go to the bathroom, or presenting her letter projects to the class. Too funny! We were also told that Gabby has told her teacher to call her “Gabriella” for specific things… like before she presents to the class, or when she is going to do something special. So, it seems that Gabriella prefers her long name when she wants to be “fancy”. Ms T also told us that Gabby is very motherly to the other kids in her class, especially to the kids who are shorter than her. Apparently, Ms. T had to tell her that she’s trying to teach everyone in the class independence so nobody needs to be *mothered*. And, she gently reminds Gabby that the kids who are shorter than her are still the same age as her. Hahahaha!! We also understand that during recess, Gabby spends almost every minute playing on the monkey bars and apparently, she gets quite competitive with the boys on those bars… creating a bit of jealousy and upset from the boys.

Gabby has grown so much this past year. I still find it pretty difficult to shop for jeans/pants for her because she is very tall, but very lean. When jeans/pants finally fit her waist, they are too short on her length-wise! This can be frustrating… but we finally found some cute/stylish yoga pants that seem to work great for school, etc. She also continues to eat like a champ! She tries pretty much everything I make and I would say she has a pretty sophisticated palette and truly appreciates/likes good food! Avocadoes, salmon, steak, chicken dishes, thai food, Mexican food, indian food… you name it… this girl eats it!

Gabby’s growth stats are now:

Height: 47 inches

Weight: 45 pounds

Gabby loves to change her earrings before school every day. She loves trying on lip glosses and even putting makeup on if I’m putting some on (which is rare these days!). She loves dressing up in different outfits, and has a real love for shoes/boots. She LOVES singing to music… and will walk around the house with headphones, an iPod, singing at the top of her lungs. Mostly Taylor Swift and songs from T.angled (the R.apunzel movie). So, for her birthday, we decided to give her an i.Pod T.ouch. Now, she loves to sing to her music, check the weather, take photos and videos of everyone, play games, etc. And, Giuliana is ALWAYS wanting Gabby’s iTouch and honestly knows how to work it… now SHE goes around playing the music and dancing to it. Little sisters are HILARIOUS!

Gabby still carries some PTSD from Matteo’s death. For example, whenever Giuliana or Rocco get hurt and blood appears… depending on the severity or my/Dan’s reaction, Gabby will breakdown crying and asking if they will be ok, if they have to go to the doctor, what’s going to happen to them, etc. It breaks my heart. It breaks Dan’s heart. I wish with all my heart she would not know what she knows, or would not have seen what she has seen when it comes to life/death. Recently, Rocco broke out in a rash from a penicillin allergy, and Gabby broke down again because we had to take Rocco to the ER. She was sobbing… asking if Rocco would come home again, what was wrong with him. We’ve found that as long as we remain calm and reassure her that everything is ok and that this stuff happens all the time, it calms her. But, the sad thing is… she knows that abnormal, unexpected things DO happen… with serious consequences that can’t be reversed. She knows death. And, we’ll never be able to take that away from her… just pad it, and build understanding that not all things lead to death. I think it’s fair to say that her *motherly* tendencies stem from her understanding of life and death, and her experience with seeing her younger brother who she loved so much, dead.

Recently, at school, after the kids were journaling on a Monday morning, one of the kids told Ms. T. that he went to a funeral and saw a casket, etc. Apparently, Gabby then went on to tell the entire class that her brother died in his crib, that her mommy was crying and screaming, that her daddy tried to make Matteo come back to life, that the police and firemen came to our house, that we had a funeral and her brother was in a casket, etc. Ugh. I was glad Ms. T. told me about this. But, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit to it kicking me in the ass and ripping out my heart and making me sad and angry and just feeling every emotion under the sun… and helpless that I can’t ever take away Gabby’s pain. I’m glad she has memories… but at the same time I HATE that she has memories. I’m still so angry and sad and frustrated and… well… you get it. Matteo shouldn’t have died. We don’t even know WHY he died. It wasn’t fair to him. It isn’t fair to his twin. It isn’t fair to his now 6 year old sister. And, it isn’t fair to Giuliana, who never got to meet him.

Life definitely has its ups and downs. I don’t blog a lot about all of my Matteo thoughts and emotions, fo many different reasons. But, it goes without saying that he is truly always on my mind. Always. ALWAYS. Not a minute goes by that I don’t think of him. I’m so thankful that Gabby and Rocco and Giuliana have made there still be a good reason to *live* life, while still dealing with a lot of grief. These little people are such precious little gifts… most people will never truly understand just how precious they are. Anyway, I digress…

Obviously, we are so proud and completely in love with our six year old! We love Gabby SO, SO very much. She is just beyond special and unique and important to us. She brings so much joy and happiness to our lives every single day. She is truly my little lady… sometimes even a little too eager to grow up. She is just a big hunk of love and sunshine and I feel so blessed to have her in our lives. We love you Gabby!! Happy 6^th Birthday!!

Photos to come!