6 Wide Down the Mountain

The Martino family is now 6 wide down the mountain!

Giuliana and Marco both tried downhill skiing for the first time last week. They both took to skiing with ease and seemed to really enjoy it. I think the younger you start them - the better. The little kids don't seem to have any trouble with crossing their skis, etc. Marco earned himself a mid-day nap on my chest. And, Giuls fell asleep while eating her crackers in the lodge at the end of the day. They were happy & pooped!

Gabby and Rocco are both skiing like champs and ready for more challenging runs.

There is a lot more snow in Tahoe this year compared to last. So, we decided to buy season passes for the family. We were able to get them up the mountain 4 times over the holiday break which was nice. It's a hop, skip and a jump from our house so it's quite easy to cruise up for even half days of skiing after school or the kids weekend basketball games.

Now we just have to HOPE for more rain storms in northern California this winter, bringing even more snow to the mountains!

Oh, and check out this ADORABLE photo some guy took of Marco and Dan on the chair lift. Marco's face is SO CUTE! Their chair lift buddy had this tiny little digital polaroid camera... pretty cool.

Grandma Oni

My grandma Leona was the sweetest, hardest-working, thoughtful, big-hearted and most kind person I have ever known. She had such a hard work ethic, she was lively and fun and entertaining, and she had the most amazing laugh. 

The last time I saw her was in September 2010. She was still living in her home at the time, and while she had slowed down considerably, she was still doing quite well. 

If I could go back in time, I would have held her real tight in a bear hug for a half hour, while telling her how special she was to me, how many wonderful memories I will keep tucked away in my heart and mind of her, how much I admired her, and what a great role model she was for me growing up. 

She passed away in the very early morning hours of January 10th. The same day my sweet twin boys were born five year prior, and Giuliana was born three years prior. 

I can only imagine her reception into the Heavens. And, I imagine my sweet little Matteo being so grateful to see his great grandmother again, helping to celebrate his birthday.

She had been living in an assisted living home for just over a year. Her health had taken some turns for the worse during the year. Then, she caught a virus in December… and she just couldn’t recover.

 She went into the hospital shortly after Christmas, and never went back to her home. My mom spent every minute she could possibly spend with her… making sure she was well taken care of, and comfortable, and that they were doing everything possible to help her pull through the virus and subsequent health issues. 

I knew in my heart that grandma Oni was pretty sick, and there was a chance she would not make it through this. But, it didn’t stop me from having high hopes and praying for a miracle and healing and strength.

I recall the night she died, praying to my little Matteo and G.od before i went to sleep. I prayed that they help her remain comfortable and that they welcome her with open arms and take very good care of her when she arrived in Heaven. I fell asleep after silently crying myself to sleep so as not to wake anyone.  

I woke up just after midnight on January 10th, and I remember looking towards the end of my bed and immediately thought of grandma Oni. I swear I could feel her presence in the room, and I felt like she was there with me. I had been so sad as I drifted off to sleep that night… and now, I felt a sweeping rush of peacefulness. I felt as if she was ok, and had a feeling that she had passed. 

Sure enough, she passed away at 1:37am (CT) on January 10th, which was 11:37pm PT on the 9th. I got goosebumps when my mom shared this with me.

I truly believe her soul visited me that night shortly after she died. 

CaLiFoRnIcATion!!

We had a great trip to California at the end of July and beginning of August. The trip was planned around two major events... me running the San Francisco marathon and our first benefit for Matteo's Dream Fund.

We were gone for a total of 11 days, including travel time (since we drove). Yes, we are that crazy family. Financially, it made the most sense and was much smarter to drive. I couldn't believe how much it was going to cost us to rent a suburban sized vehicle... we couldn't find anything for under $1,800.00 for 8 days. Add air tickets for 3 adults and 2 children (we brought our au pair) and that added at least another $1,000.00... and then we still needed hotel rooms on top of that! Driving saved us oodles of money!! But seriously... what was with the sky-high car rental prices over the summer!?

Also, because we needed to drive... this was the perfect time to invest in a bigger family vehicle, which we have been in need of. I LOVED the mini-van... no really, I did! Sliding, touch-a-button-to-open-doors being my very favorite feature... closely followed by the low chassis for ease of loading kids, and ease of parking it! But... it just wouldn't cut it for this trip with 3 adults, 3 children, and luggage for all! So, we ended up getting a used 2008 black Yukon Denali XL. And, it's been fabulous and perfect - love it. Still miss the mini-van a tad bit, but can't imagine not having all the extra space now.

The only challenging part of driving meant that we wanted to do it over night... leaving home in the afternoon and Dan and I driving throughout the night. Both of us ended up being sleep deprived. The unfortunate extra challenge was Giuliana once again battling a fever on the drive down and us having to stop at the ER in Medford, OR, after being directed to do so by our pediatrician.

Gabby traveled really well in the car with very little complaining - would totally do this with her again. Rocco spent most of the drive down (when awake) asking if we were at the beach yet. He loves the beach! He slept pretty good... but on the drive down and back, he did have one wake-up where he started crying hard because he wanted to be stretched out in his bed. Poor 'lil guy! Giuliana did not travel very well at all! When sleeping, she would wake up every couple hours crying and frustrated that she was in her seat. On the way home, 3 hours into the drive, she had a major meltdown after spending 45 mins on repeat, saying "mamma! out! mamma! buckle! out!" So, we had to stop for a little while, get her some food, and we were able to distract her enough to get her buckled up again and driving. It was torture though hearing/seeing her so upset to be stuck in the car seat! UGH!

We arrived the day before the marathon. Giuliana was still battling a virus with a nasty fever, and I caught a 1.5 hour nap to prep for the marathon the next morning, while Dan and Maria took the kids over to Fisherman's Wharf. We spent the night in 2 hotel rooms located right on Fisherman's Wharf. We had a fantastic Italian dinner on Columbus Ave the night before the race, and played at the "new since I lived there park" at Washington Square Park in North Beach (my old 'hood!). Dan and I of course loved hanging out in our old neighborhood... reminiscing about how we'd go out to dinner almost every night... just walking to any one of hundreds of yummy restaurants. The nostalgia hit hard - that was such a great, carefree time in our lives!

The marathon was Sunday. My family and Maria all got up at 5am and walked two blocks north to cheer me on 1.5 miles into the course - what troopers! LOVE them! After the race, we went back to the hotel, kids napped, I cleaned up and then we went touring and grabbed some yummy food in the Marina (also an old haunt of ours). We took the kids and Maria to Lombard Street and the Golden Gate Bridge. Then, we bbq'd with Kathleen's family at our friend's Sara & Brad's beautiful home in Noe Valley. We spent the next 2 nights there... it was SO NICE of them to allow us to stay at their home while they were on vacation! Thanks again guys!!

On Monday, we drove up to Stinson Beach and spent the afternoon soaking up the sun, digging in the sand, jumping waves and just relaxing. We had a great lunch at a little cafe right off the beach. It was a perfect day!

On Tuesday, we went to a park for the kids, did a picnic lunch, and then hit Venice Beach in Half Moon Bay for more playing in the sand, water and soaking up the sunshine. Dinner was Mexican food in Pacifica.

On Wednesday we headed down to our hotel right on the main strip in Los Gatos. Wednesday night we went to our good friend's and old neighbor's home, Jody & Andy. It was super fun to catch up with them, and spend time with all the kids together. Dan worked on Wednesday and Thursday. And, I spent Wednesday and Thursday prepping for the Matteo's Dream Fund benefit... there was LOTS to be done so it was like a full time job! It was SO GREAT staying in downtown Los Gatos though... seriously, truly LOVE that town. And, loved walking around town each night and hitting different/favorite restaurants of ours. Maria watched the kids during the day and took them over to Oakmeadow Park on the train, carousel and all the play equipment. They also played in the fountain in Los Gatos's town square park.

Friday, we took the kids and Maria to Natural Bridges beach and Santa Cruz beach & boardwalk. Then, we went to Kathleen's house that night... her mountain neighborhood has a bbq every Friday night during the summer with great food and volleyball, boccie ball, parks for the kids, etc. It was a fun, relaxed night hanging with good friends.

Saturday was our event for Matteo's Dream Fund!! It was a total success and you can read more about that here.

Sunday, we spent the afternoon with our family.... Leo, Kenny, Trish, Todd and Courtney and it was fabulous! We've really missed them SO MUCH since we've lived in Washington. It's brought me to tears at times... I truly miss having them/family near us and being a part of the kid's lives. The kids have really missed them too, so it was such a great afternoon of quality time together. Trish made a super-delicious dinner (as always) and we caught up with everyone's lives. So fun!!

Monday, we headed home... we had to rent a small trailer to get us home because Leo & Kenny had been babysitting 5 of our very large plants ever since we moved! Also, we ended up having a lot of extra Matteo's Dream Fund "stuff" to bring home.

Oh... and on our way home, we unknowingly stole a gas pump line @ 4am from a gas station in Washington!! It was hilarious! Dan had been driving since we left at 2pm on Monday afternoon. We stopped at a gas station. I took Gabby in to go potty. Dan started pumping gas. Dan came in and browsed for snacks. Then, I browsed for snacks and told him I could drive. He agreed because he was exhausted and went out to the car. I paid, went out to the car, jumped in the drivers seat and took off. We were probably 4 or 5 miles on the Interstate and I saw something sparking in my side mirror... something was hanging off the side of the truck. What? So, I asked Dan if he noticed that earlier. I couldn't figure out what it was. Dan thought it was a chain from the trailer. No.... couldn't be.... not from where it was hanging. I looked closer in the mirror and realized it was the GAS PUMP LINE!! OMG!! Sparking EVERY time it hit the road!! I started laughing so hard as I realized what it was... Dan was SO upset and did not think it was funny one bit. I couldn't stop laughing and I started slowing down so we could pull over and remove it. I couldn't help but wonder what the couple cars who were now passing us thought of this.... total crazy white-trash people, right?! OMG... soooooo funny! Still can't believe this happened. Obviously, I never checked the gas pump before I got in the car. I guess I figured that since Dan started pumping the gas, he would finish it! Especially since he was in the store browsing for food! Slight communication problem there, eh?! That was the funniest story from our trip... will definitely remember this forever! HA!

Oh the irony...

Giuliana is 3 months old now. I honestly can't believe it. Time flies.

Giuliana slept her first 10 hour stretch last night from 9:30pm-7:30am. She's rolling onto her side, and when she's on her tummy, she's almost rolling onto her back. She LOVES when people talk to her... she'll smile and coo and she kicks her legs real hard. She's just beyond precious and we all love her so very much.

This past week was crazy, as Dan was in Boston for work, our au pair was on vacation, Rocco was diagnosed with bronchitis and Giuliana was then diagnosed with a double ear infection. So, every trip outside the house involved dragging three kids along with me... to the grocery store, school drops-offs and pick-ups, the pharmacy, etc. Everything had to revolve around Giuliana's nursing and her and Rocco's naps. And, if that wasn't enough... it was going to the be the first time I didn't have another adult staying with me in the house since Matteo died. I was dreading it. A big part of me was SO scared... especially since Rocco and Giuls were sick..I was so worried something bad was going to happen... again.

I knew it was another big hurdle I would eventually need to cross. And while I was dreading it and didn't think I was quite ready yet.... I did it. By Thursday, I was SO sleep deprived. I must have checked the kids a million times throughout the night to make sure they were still breathing.

I was SO EXCITED to see Dan walk in that front door again!

Anyway, on Saturday... it was unusually cold here. So, we decided to bring Giuliana in for her 3 month photos. And, since we all went together... we ended up getting a few family shots too.

The moment we walked into the studio they assigned us to, we pulled the curtain shut, the kids sprinted across the floor and we heard another mother outside of our studio say "Look at Matteo!"

I looked at Dan and almost fell over. I didn't believe my ears... so I asked Dan if he just heard what I heard. And, he looked at me and said "Yeah... I heard it. Matteo."

The irony.

There we were, with our 3 living children... both of us knowing/thinking about how Matteo should have been with us. And, another mother outside of OUR studio talks about Matteo. Her Matteo. It's not like Matteo is even that common of a name, right? In that moment... I couldn't have wished harder that it was MY Matteo she was talking about.

Pure coincidence?

I don't know. But, gosh... these zingers just tear me apart and make me want to believe they are little signs from OUR little Matteo.

When we left the studio with the prints, all I could think about was what Matteo would have looked like yesterday... where he would have been standing/sitting... what he would have worn. I contemplated photoshopping his little face into the photos. Seriously - I contemplated this. But, I ruled it out for the obvious reasons. It just wouldn't look right and people would probably think I was NUTS. I don't want to be nuts. I just want my baby back. I want him to grow with us and be part of our family again.

Nine months have passed and I still haven't been able to display a recent family photo in our house because Matteo isn't in them. I look at recent family photos and I see incomplete photos... he's missing. Gone. Just like that. Frozen forever in time as an 18 month old.

A friend, who also just happens to be a an amazing professional photographer (David - DNK Digital) took some great photos of us last fall when our family was newly broken and Giuliana was 7 months along. I love the photos, but until now could never even post them on the blog.

Maybe it's time to contemplate crossing the next big hurdle of displaying a more recent family photo in the house.

Maybe.