We spent Christmas at home again this year... the big difference being that we were in our new home.It was a little strange to not be spending the holiday with either of our extended families. We've celebrated the Christmas holiday with our California family for the past four years. So, it was both relaxing and possibly a wee bit too quiet to not be prepping for and hosting a delicious four course Christmas Day dinner.
And, after a summer of traveling and living like gypsies, we just weren't ready to travel anywhere. We decided we would much rather take this time as a family to finally "breathe" a little and enjoy some quality time together after the whirlwind of chaos that goes along with a big move.
The anticipation of Christmas was almost palpable in our home this year. The kids were SO excited about every single traditional event leading up to the big day. Everything from getting the Christmas tree, to decorating it, putting up Christmas decorations throughout the house, making holiday cookies, picking out presents and wrapping them... you name it - they were SO EXCITED! Needless to say... the anticipation of opening presents was also discussed several times a day.
The kids also LOVE our somewhat new Elf on the Shelf tradition. Dan and I love it too, actually. We just wish we could use the Elf threat throughout the year... you know, the "you better be good... Elf is watching and he's going to fly back to the North Pole tonight and tell Santa what you did!" It snaps the kids in line every time. Love it! Some of my high school girlfriends gifted us with this last year. I swear... it's the gift that keeps on giving! ha!
The kids had so many more questions about Santa this year... everything from where does he live to how does he get inside our house? Will he know we moved? How does he get to the mall? Where are his real reindeer when he's at the mall? Why does the mall only have fake reindeer? Where are his elves when he's at the mall? Etc.
We also got the three kids to SIT NEXT to Santa for a photo this year and not one child was crying! This is a miracle!!! I am 99% sure it was because this year's Santa photo included some of their pals. So a group of pals all put on their brave faces and sat with Santa. Granted, my children didn't say one word to him... but that's ok. We got a Santa photo with no screamers! Yay! Santa photos from Christmas' past are worthy of winning "worst Santa photo ever" contests. And, I'm not kidding!! Check Gabby out in this photo from 2006... you'd think she just saw a ghost. And, here's Gabby and the twins in 2008... and yes that's me, holding Gabby down on my lap. So funny!
And, of course, they were so excited about opening presents. We'd get the "can I open one present?" question at least once a day for the 3 weeks leading up to Christmas. Only because for once in my life I happened to be somewhat organized with my gift purchasing and did a majority of it before Thanksgiving when the toy store had huge deals. I was shocked that they never actually opened a gift early... yes, they were sat on, thrown, used to build forts, and dragged and dropped throughout the house. But, not one was intentionally opened early! Such good little kidlets!
On Christmas Eve, we went to mass so we could say "Happy Birthday" to baby Jesus, and listen to and sing along with the beautiful Christmas music. Giuliana slept through the first half of mass. Rocco spent most of the service playing in the basement with Dan and then proceeded to fall asleep ten minutes before church ended. And, Gabby was alert and asking questions throughout the service... she was so excited to go home and rip through some presents. Dan made a delish lasagna and we ate until we were stuffed and then ripped through all of our family presents. It went shockingly fast and Gabby was VERY quick to help Giuliana open all of her gifts.
The kids also LOVE our somewhat new Elf on the Shelf tradition. Dan and I love it too, actually. We just wish we could use the Elf threat throughout the year... you know, the "you better be good... Elf is watching and he's going to fly back to the North Pole tonight and tell Santa what you did!" It snaps the kids in line every time. Love it! Some of my high school girlfriends gifted us with this last year. I swear... it's the gift that keeps on giving! ha!
The kids had so many more questions about Santa this year... everything from where does he live to how does he get inside our house? Will he know we moved? How does he get to the mall? Where are his real reindeer when he's at the mall? Why does the mall only have fake reindeer? Where are his elves when he's at the mall? Etc.
We also got the three kids to SIT NEXT to Santa for a photo this year and not one child was crying! This is a miracle!!! I am 99% sure it was because this year's Santa photo included some of their pals. So a group of pals all put on their brave faces and sat with Santa. Granted, my children didn't say one word to him... but that's ok. We got a Santa photo with no screamers! Yay! Santa photos from Christmas' past are worthy of winning "worst Santa photo ever" contests. And, I'm not kidding!! Check Gabby out in this photo from 2006... you'd think she just saw a ghost. And, here's Gabby and the twins in 2008... and yes that's me, holding Gabby down on my lap. So funny!
And, of course, they were so excited about opening presents. We'd get the "can I open one present?" question at least once a day for the 3 weeks leading up to Christmas. Only because for once in my life I happened to be somewhat organized with my gift purchasing and did a majority of it before Thanksgiving when the toy store had huge deals. I was shocked that they never actually opened a gift early... yes, they were sat on, thrown, used to build forts, and dragged and dropped throughout the house. But, not one was intentionally opened early! Such good little kidlets!
On Christmas Eve, we went to mass so we could say "Happy Birthday" to baby Jesus, and listen to and sing along with the beautiful Christmas music. Giuliana slept through the first half of mass. Rocco spent most of the service playing in the basement with Dan and then proceeded to fall asleep ten minutes before church ended. And, Gabby was alert and asking questions throughout the service... she was so excited to go home and rip through some presents. Dan made a delish lasagna and we ate until we were stuffed and then ripped through all of our family presents. It went shockingly fast and Gabby was VERY quick to help Giuliana open all of her gifts.
Giuliana really couldn't have cared less to open any of her gifts. All she wanted to do was hold the gifts that Gabby and Rocco opened... and she thought that was the best job in the house. She was all smiles every time something new was opened... she'd walk over and pick it up and next thing you know she'd have the world's biggest smile on her face.
Rocco loved opening all the gifts and seeing the new toys. The Nerf guns seemed to be his favorite gifts of the evening. It cracked me up when he opened a few gifts with clothes in them... becuase he wouldn't even react to it... rather... it's almost like the clothes were tissue paper. He'd pull the sweater out of the box, drop it with no facial reaction or comment and move right on to the next gift. So funny!
It's such fun to be a parent at this time of year. Christmas is so magical and full of anticipation for the kids. And, I love making it magical for them... creating traditions, putting up lights and decorations, making the house smell like cinnamon, spices and cranberries, and buying gifts I think they'll love.
Rocco loved opening all the gifts and seeing the new toys. The Nerf guns seemed to be his favorite gifts of the evening. It cracked me up when he opened a few gifts with clothes in them... becuase he wouldn't even react to it... rather... it's almost like the clothes were tissue paper. He'd pull the sweater out of the box, drop it with no facial reaction or comment and move right on to the next gift. So funny!
It's such fun to be a parent at this time of year. Christmas is so magical and full of anticipation for the kids. And, I love making it magical for them... creating traditions, putting up lights and decorations, making the house smell like cinnamon, spices and cranberries, and buying gifts I think they'll love.
This year was Giuliana's first Christmas. It was also our second Christmas without Matteo. I think we recognized both appropriately by adding a new tradition to our holiday. It was incredibly meaningful to us, and taught our kids one of life's best lessons... GIVING to those less fortunate. Thanks to the Matteo Tate Martino Memorial Fund, we were able to donate a LOT of toys on behalf of Matteo's Dream Fund to a local children's hospital. While I had tears in my eyes and was on the verge of crying the entire day, it was such a feel-good thing for all of us. Good medicine, really, at a time in the year when we need it most. We are already looking forward to doing it again next year!
Santa worked VERY hard on Christmas Eve again this year to make sure certain toys would be sitting out under the Christmas tree. I know this because I heard lots of grumbling, grunts, and the occasional naughty word coming from our office until almost 2am. I think the bourbon helped ease the pain and stress of the situation though. You'd think Santa would have learned his lesson last year after he stayed up until 3am putting together the train table. But nooooo... not even Mrs. Claus could convince him to start his prep work early. Maybe next year?
This year, the kids asked Santa for:
Gabby: a sleeping bag, a pogo stick, and a new doll house for her Barbi.e dolls
Rocco: a big red mean fire truck with a big tall mean ladder, a really fast car, and shooter guns
Giuliana: mamamamama
This photo was taken just minutes after Santa came:
Santa worked VERY hard on Christmas Eve again this year to make sure certain toys would be sitting out under the Christmas tree. I know this because I heard lots of grumbling, grunts, and the occasional naughty word coming from our office until almost 2am. I think the bourbon helped ease the pain and stress of the situation though. You'd think Santa would have learned his lesson last year after he stayed up until 3am putting together the train table. But nooooo... not even Mrs. Claus could convince him to start his prep work early. Maybe next year?
This year, the kids asked Santa for:
Gabby: a sleeping bag, a pogo stick, and a new doll house for her Barbi.e dolls
Rocco: a big red mean fire truck with a big tall mean ladder, a really fast car, and shooter guns
Giuliana: mamamamama
This photo was taken just minutes after Santa came:
These photos were taken Christmas morning, shortly after the kids came downstairs and discovered that Santa visited during the night with some toys.
If you asked the kids what their favorite gifts from Santa were, they would tell you
Gabby = Grandview Dollhouse (taller than her!)
Rocco = his "motor" (as he calls it)... basically a mini-ATV.
Giuliana = Little People car ramp (almost as tall as her)
The gifts that didn't last 24 hours? That would be the slinkies Santa left for the big kids in their stockings. This is a photo of two slinkies... somehow mangled and twisted together and left for little Giuliana to discover as she was doing her penguin walk around the house.
On Christmas Day, we basically just relaxed in our PJs all day and played with all the new toys. Matteo never far from our hearts or thoughts as we found ourselves imagining what he would have enjoyed most about this holiday, and what toys would have peaked his interest this year. I would give anything to have been able to see Rocco and Matteo driving around on their own mini-ATV's together.
I can't possibly describe how difficult holidays are since losing Matteo. Every day is obviously difficult. Holidays accentuate that degree of difficulty as everyone you know is spending the day with their families and their children. There is always an innate feeling that something is missing. Matteo is missing. Every minute of every day for the rest of my life, he'll be missing. My mind knows he is gone, but every single part of me wishes he was here. So, it's not even possible to put a feeling like that in the back of my mind. I'm quite certain this feeling will never change. Rather, I'll just have to find a way to live with it.
Gabby = Grandview Dollhouse (taller than her!)
Rocco = his "motor" (as he calls it)... basically a mini-ATV.
Giuliana = Little People car ramp (almost as tall as her)
The gifts that didn't last 24 hours? That would be the slinkies Santa left for the big kids in their stockings. This is a photo of two slinkies... somehow mangled and twisted together and left for little Giuliana to discover as she was doing her penguin walk around the house.
On Christmas Day, we basically just relaxed in our PJs all day and played with all the new toys. Matteo never far from our hearts or thoughts as we found ourselves imagining what he would have enjoyed most about this holiday, and what toys would have peaked his interest this year. I would give anything to have been able to see Rocco and Matteo driving around on their own mini-ATV's together.
I can't possibly describe how difficult holidays are since losing Matteo. Every day is obviously difficult. Holidays accentuate that degree of difficulty as everyone you know is spending the day with their families and their children. There is always an innate feeling that something is missing. Matteo is missing. Every minute of every day for the rest of my life, he'll be missing. My mind knows he is gone, but every single part of me wishes he was here. So, it's not even possible to put a feeling like that in the back of my mind. I'm quite certain this feeling will never change. Rather, I'll just have to find a way to live with it.
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1 comments:
I have no idea how we learn to live with it, either, but as I've said before, you seem to be doing such a good job at it, from the outside, at least--helping your kids continue to experience joy even as you grieve all that you have lost. It's a tight rope we will walk forever, I guess. But as always, you and your family are an inspiration to me-- one I wish you'd never had to be, but an inspiration nonetheless. Much love, Jodi.
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